Yes, Elizabeth and I have been dieting and exercising again.
It's hard to believe, but these past few months here in New York of all work and little play has left me with a little spare tire around my waist. It feels like I can float with this thing around me.
And besides, we have very little time left before we get to go on our belated honeymoon. Yippie! Finally, I know. We going to spend eight gorgeous nights in some multi-starred hotel in Maui. Waka Laka Laka...that means, look at that fat Chinese guy, the one with the spare tire around his waist.
So, we've been exercising. This is very surprising, but since I have started exercising again, things seem so much heavier. I don't know what it is. My theory is that gravity is much more prevalent inside the gym. Nonetheless, Elizabeth and I have become pretty good workout partners...when she is cooperating.
It was my turn on the bench press. We loaded up the bar with weights, she the left side and me on the right side. We circled back around the bench, she to the back and me to the front. She was acting a little funny, but I wasn't sure of why. I was prompted to start the set. I laid back from my seated position, looked up at the bar, and made sure that my body was in line. I checked my head, shoulder girdle, back, bottom, and ensured that my feet were positioned correctly. I reached up and grabbed the bar at equal points on both sides.
"C'mon. Ready?" she called out. Maybe she noticed I was stalling.
"Okay," I answered and she helped me lift it off the rack and I proceeded with the repetitions.
One..two..three..four..five..six..se.. se.. se.. I was caught! There was nothing I could do. My left shoulder that had been bothering me for years apparently under-conditioned was just collapsing due to the fatigue. Rigorously, I tried pushing the weight back up. I juxtaposed my torso, kicked up with my feet and tried pushing up the bar. No luck. The bar was coming down slowly. I looked up to her but her attention was diverted staring off in the two o'clock direction. I noticed people glancing over from their exercise stations and about to come over to help.
As the bar neared two inches from my torso, I was able to muster up my last gasp and let out a little peep, "ugh..."
It was able to catch her attention as she snapped her head to look down at me, snatching at the bar, and helped jimmy it back up granting me relief and the will to live again. "What...What were you doing?" I asked while gasping for air, "You... you were supposed to be spotting me."
"Umm...nothing," she answered innocently.
I looked over at the two o'clock position and wouldn't you know it...dude watching.
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original pic by http://www.worldwide-holiday.com http://intellipage.com/simpsons